Posts tagged #creative recovery

Your searing pain + the unnerving real reasons my book is so cheap

Your searing pain

You stall on projects that are dear to you.  You sometimes wake up feeling a kind of angst which you know has driven other great minds to suicide. You sense there's a huge disconnect between what matters most to your heart and what seems to matter to the rest of the world and that feeling of disconnect fucking hurts.

 

I know that hurt, and I know how to overcome it, a day at a time.  I've written a book.  It's called Awesome Your Life: The Artist's Antidote to Suffering Genius. And I don't mean "suffering genius" lightly as in "whininess." I mean "suffering genius" as in "life-threatening alienation and terror." It's an existential phenomenon that I take seriously. Dear, amazing friends of mine have murdered themselves via overdose or suicide because they couldn't cope with the pain of living with their own sensitive and visionary minds.

 

Because it is such a real and dangerous problem, the solution to the pain of suffering genius isn't easy. The book leads you through a difficult and harrowing hero's journey wherein you learn how to experience ecstatic joy and consistent creative flow by facing the trials and invitations of your unconscious. Only there's something kind of unnervingly weird about my book.

 

The weirdness is that my book is very cheap. 99 cents.

 

There are a lot of things in this world that cost 99 cents and suck.  Like "food" on McDonald's value menu. Or potentially toxic toys made in China. Or Justin Bieber's songs on iTunes, which my best friend Gloria inexplicably loves. My book, however, does not suck. It actually rather rocks, as these thoughtful reviews attest.

 

The unnerving real reasons my book is so cheap

So why, if my book rocks so stunningly hard, does it cost 99 cents? The answer has to do with my radical politics and pulse-pounding hope. Here, in no particular order, yet in a satisfyingly numbered fashion, are the shocking reasons:

 

  1. I want to live in a gift economy. So the book is a gift. There are books and programs for increasing creativity available online that cost more than a hundred dollars.  My book, I can say within all honesty and modesty, is thoroughly as good or better than these. It's the product of research and practice that cost me many thousands of dollars and years of work. I could charge $150 for the Awesome Your Life program, glittered up with a few audios and videos mixed in.  Maybe I'll do this at some point. But right now I love the feeling of offering something that's of very high value for a very low price. Merry Christmas, one and all!
  2. I really love the Occupy movement. 99 cent books for the 99 per cent!
  3. The book teaches that the point of creativity is the enjoyment and generation of the gift world, a state of grace in which needs are met without hardship. 99 cents is a price that allows the book to be available for most without hardship.  And if 99 cents is still a price that generates difficulty for you-- email me (sweetsongofjoy at gmail dot com) and we'll work something out.
  4. Many of my friends are broke brilliant artists, who live in their warehouse studios or with their parents.  I know how they struggle, and I wanted them to be able to afford my book.  Indeed, I want all broke brilliant people to be able to afford my book (see the point above).
  5. I'm interested less in money and more in readers.  I'd love for not only you to read the book, but also for all of your friends and your mom and the people you don't really like that much to read the book.  For $15, the price of a regular book, you could gift the book to yourself and 14 people you don't even really like that much! Thereby securing yourself excellent karma. Or, since you don't like them that much, you could just tell them to suck it up and buy it for themselves. It's only 99 cents, sheesh.
  6. The book shows you how to embody throbbing, extra-rational optimism.  I'm throbbingly, extra-rationally optimistic that I'll become a 99 cent Kindle best-seller like Amanda Hocking.
  7. The best books I ever read in my life I got for 99 cents at a thrift store. So I feel like returning the favor to the world.
  8. I don't like to pay a lot for stuff, and by extension, I don't like asking others to do so.
  9. Did I mention it's Christmas? I fucking love Christmas.

 

Yay!

 

There's a lot more empassioned empathy, raucous humor, and daring solutions in the book.  So why not buy it?

 

Love!

Carolyn

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

An Open Love Letter to Creative and Brilliant Men

Dear Creative and Brilliant Men, I'm lucky to hang out with you all the time-- at parties, at meetings, at home (that's you, my wondrous partner).  I see you doing your thing out in the world-- researching, performing, building, teaching-- and I notice the skepticism and shaming you endure from society in general, from family, and from the women in your life (sometimes even me).

We tell you to stop playing around, do something serious, bring in the cold hard cash. ("Why don't you do right, like some other men do?")

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P2f40eQcYXk

("Why don't you get outta here and bring me some money too?")

Please don't listen.  Please be you.  Please make and do insane stuff that dazzles me.

I look around and I notice that a lot of the creative recovery material out there is geared toward women and focussed on fostering the divine feminine.  Of course that's incredibly important-- but I just want to say that my divine femininity needs your divine masculinity in its full force-- whether you're my friend, my lover, or just some guy whose show I go see.

I need you to be out there and in here with me relentlessly playing, pushing the edges, stalking strange prey.  I need you to be cheeky, cocky, and totally out of my control.

Whenever you do this-- whenever you inhabit the glory of your playful masculine nature with no apologies and no shame (something that's very hard to do in an age where masculinity is constantly caricatured as base violence and lust) you invite me into a dance and give me freedom to deeply embody my femininity. I can relax. I can surrender.  I don't have to be managing everything.  Your strength and verve can make me forget myself-- and in doing this, put me in touch with the well of pleasure at the core of my being.

But this isn't always clear in the moment. Sometimes I resist. I might give you a tight-lipped smile and shake my head in disapproval.  I might nag you about making more money. I might not look like I'm totally thrilled when you spend the weekend on an esoteric research project instead of taking me out.  I could act like I don't care that you've got mad skills when it comes to painting, rapping, laying labyrinths or making robots.  Like I'm not impressed. Like I'm not delighted.

But the thing is-- I am, totally.  And whenever I don't show it it's only because I'm stuck in my own nonsense fear and grumpy neuter adultness.  Be patient; keep burning; keep flashing.  Your strength and commitment to your purpose is irresistible, intoxicating, liberating.  It opens me, melts me, kills the dead parts of me.  And leaves me so glad that you're my friend, my lover, or the dude who's show I'm seeing. Because fuck knows I need to be opened, melted, killed-- again and again. (The ladies of Heart know what I'm talkin' about).

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mXOO7QVHgXs

("He's a magic man, mama!")

So if you're feeling tired or discouraged or bedraggled today please don't give up. Don't give in to the pressure to be normal. Don't stop. Keep on. Please push harder and venture more wildly-- for my sake and for that of all the women you love, dear magic man.

Love,

Carolyn

 

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